Planets are big.

Yes, indeed, they are! In fact, planets are bigger than the Moon. And here's a cool video showing that. Another Youtube post today!

Bon Iver: Michicant

I have been playing this song over and over this week. It's a good one.

I was unafraid. I was a boy. I was a tender age.

Today I

- Wore my unwashed hair in a messy bun on the top of my head.
- Learned not to use two spaces after a period. Read here.
- Ate the same leftover food for lunch and dinner.
- Skipped breakfast.
- Listened to my Bon Iver station on Pandora. Got bored of the music in between the Bon Iver songs and just listened to Bon Iver albums instead.
- Studied for the GRE.
- Did two loads of laundry.
- Picked up my husband from school.
- Talked to my sister for two minutes as she walked to her psychology class.
- Fell asleep after dinner and jerked awake ten minutes later when my phone alarm went off.
- Uploaded pictures to Facebook at my sister's request. Realized it was awhile since I last uploaded an album on Facebook.
- Read all of my old unpublished drafts on this blog (there are 46 of them.)

Respite

Today was a Seattle day up until about five o'clock. The sky was gray. The trees were green. The roads were damp. The air was cool and there was a strong smell of earth. And then there was a tornado warning issued for the Athens-Clarke County. I spent the next half hour or so in a closet.

Campus was empty when I dropped Brenden off to practice at the music building. There was, however, a truck dragging a trailer full of porta-potties around.

Back at the house, our neighbors' dogs (and birds?) were throwing fits next door. My GRE vocabulary study time was interrupted by yelps and whining as well as frenzied bird noises. Peregrination, peroration, prestidigitation, stultification.

I woke up this morning at ten-thirty grasping at the remnants of the dreams I had just left behind. I had dreamt of people I missed. People living eight hundred eighty two miles away. Living one thousand nine hundred fifty four miles away. Dead. I wanted so badly to go back to sleep and visit with those dead loved ones I could not call or write or email. We drove up to our old house, made the turn off Ferry Road and there they were, two great-uncles (brothers) sitting on our old porch in rocking chairs we never owned. It's strange. In my dreams, those that are dead in real life always know that they are dead or dying. Perhaps it's my mind reminding me this is temporary. It will not last. They will not last. They didn't.

I woke up and I wanted to shut out the light pouring in from the window. I was willing myself back to sleep but I was awake. I couldn't go back to sleep. And even if I had been able to, my great- uncles would have been gone; everyone I was visiting with last night and this morning was gone.

The strange thing about my desire to go back to my dreams was that these weren't normal dreams. These were anxiety-ridden nightmares. The people living one thousand nine hundred fifty four miles away were telling me they couldn't help me and left me in an empty parking lot as I frantically tried to figure out what I needed to do (though now I can't remember what it was I needed help with). The people living eight hundred eighty two miles away were trying to keep me hidden from others trying to kill me. And the people no longer living were telling me they were going to die as they rocked back and forth in the rocking chairs on the porch of my post- Hurricane Ike childhood home.

I woke up whimpering like a frightened child and I still wanted to go back to those dreams.

Let me tell you this: if you meet a loner, no matter what they tell you, it’s not because they enjoy solitude. It's because they have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint them.
-Jodi Picoult

Wednesday

Today Brenden has music diagnostic exams on campus so I'm at home by myself for a good portion of the day.

The maintenance guy came and fixed some things. The ATT guy came and set up our phone and internet. The trash guy came and brought us a trash can. I'm currently waiting for a representative to answer my call on Uniden's Customer Care Line. The pre-recorded messages keep telling me that they will be with me in "just a moment" and to "please hold for just a moment longer." Also there's some guy with a Southern accent that pops up at the end of every recorded message cycle advertising the now available bluetooth cellular headset that comes with a bonus car adapter. The music is perhaps the best part though. It reminds me of an early nineties video game. I can't recall the exact name of the one I'm thinking of but I've got a specific one in mind.

I've looked at some jobs on UGA's human resources website. I've looked at some graduate programs on UGA's graduate school website. I've looked up a recipe for chicken and gnocchi soup. And now I'm blogging.

(Sidenote: I just got off the phone with the guy from Uniden and tried to figure out what happened to my music. I had been sitting with the phone on speaker while I was waiting but now my early nineties video game soundtrack complete with Southern sales rep has gone.)

This year will be interesting for me. I will be job hunting until I find a job. I will be home/volunteering until I find a job. I might also be applying for graduate programs. Maybe I'll learn how to use my sewing machine. I could finally read all of those books I've been buying this summer. I can take dance lessons. Catch up on the sleep I lost these past few years. Learn a new hobby. Review the Dewey Decimal System. Write a book. Give homemaking a try. See if I like it. Try to like it if I don't.

I think my biggest problem with finding a job is knowing it's temporary. Because it's temporary (and because I'm not sure for how long it will be temporary- two years or until next fall) I really don't know what I want to do. Guess I should figure that out. Brenden's only been gone for part of one day and I've had people at the house for a good part of that day and I have tons of unpacking to do and I'm in the middle of reading three different books and I'm still bored. Ridiculously bored.

I want to take dance classes again so badly. Looking up adult ballet, pointe, and contemporary dance classes in Athens.

Today I

- Packed many things
- Bought lemonade from a children's lemonade stand
- Watched a documentary on the history of ice cream
- Researched trail running

Currently I am considering cutting my own hair tonight so I will be forced to actually go out and get it fixed. I've been wanting something new since last summer but haven't cared enough to do anything about it. I haven't even had a trim since before my wedding. This entire summer has consisted of me pulling my hair into a bun on the back/top of my head. I've gotten to the point where I can't even find my hairbrush anymore because I haven't bothered brushing my hair in so long. Cave woman Natalie. At least I still wash it.

Concert List.

Thinking about music. Concerts I've been to (in chronological order):

Concert #1: Cynthia Mitchell Woodlands Pavilion, The Woodlands, Texas
- A*Teens (is that how they spelled their name?)
- Britney Spears

I went to this show the summer between 5th and 6th grade. It was a birthday present for Stef, which probably wasn't super necessary since we went to the Philippines that summer and Stef got a huge birthday party complete with charred baby goat. My parents took us (yes, my dad went too, the good sport that he is). Stef and I wore matching shirts.

Concert #2: Cynthia Mitchell Woodlands Pavilion, The Woodlands, Texas
- Thin Lizzy
- Joe Satriani
- Deep Purple

Awesome awesome show. $10 tickets for lawn seats. Got bumped up to regular covered seating because there were tons of extra seats (kinda sad). Only problem: Too many old women in leather.

Concert #3: Cynthia Mitchell Woodlands Pavilion, The Woodlands, Texas
-MAE
-Weezer
-Foo Fighters

Brought my friend, Michelle, to this show. The women seated in front of us swatted at a bee. Bee stung Michelle. We waited to see if she was allergic since this was her first bee sting. Thankfully she wasn't and we were able to enjoy the show. Though the Foo Fighters' front man seemed to be a little drunk. Oh, also, we could smell pot.

Concert #4: Warehouse Live, Houston, Texas
-Jeremy Enigk
-Cursive

I was able to tell Jeremy Enigk I loved him and gave Cursive band members a brief review of the movie Stranger than Fiction ("It was awesome!"). It was my first standing room only concert.

Concert #5: The Hobby Center, Houston, Texas
-OK Go
-Death Cab for Cutie

I met one of my good friends at this concert. My brother came to this concert with me and current boyfriend at the time. Chris spotted someone wearing a BYU cap and went and talked to him. This dude's name was Andrew Salt and he was there with his friend Jay Rainsdon. Apparently they lived in Katy. Chris, former boyfriend, and I went to our remarkably good box seats next to the stage and met up again with Jay and Andrew. They had snuck into our box with someone else that had seats there. After OK Go's act, a security guard came and kicked them out and I didn't see them again. Almost a year later, on my 19th birthday, I introduced myself to a group of people outside the Cannon Center and some guy runs up to me, points his finger in my face, and yells "YOU WERE AT THE OK GO CONCERT!" Jay remembered me.

Concert #6: In the Venue, SLC, Utah
-Glass Candy
-Architecture in Helsinki

I still feel slightly guilty about going to this show. I tricked someone into taking me and Lisa Jones by convincing them they liked Architecture in Helsinki when they'd only heard one song that didn't really reflect the rest of their style. But seriously, is it my fault that they can't recognize the greatness that is Architecture in Helsinki?

Concert #7: In the Venue, SLC, Utah
-MGMT
-of Montreal

We squeezed 6 freshmen in someone's older sister's car for this event. One of the most interesting nights of freshman year. We really enjoyed MGMT's performance though we'd never heard of them before. (It was this tour that probably helped make them popular.) So we bought their t-shirts and CD rather than of Montreal's. There was some other artist that performed with them but not only do I not remember their name but I've tried to block their sad performance from my memory.

Concert #8: Thanksgiving Point, Lehi, Utah
-Tegan and Sara
-Death Cab for Cutie

Again. Probably one of my favorite bands. I want to see them when they play in Georgia this year. It was raining as we were driving to the venue and we were rather concerned since the concert was outdoors. The concert went on and it was spectacular. Vampire Weekend was supposed to share the stage as well but they didn't make it-- that was somewhat disappointing.

Concert #9: Paramount Theatre, Seattle, Washington
-Imogen Heap

I went to this concert with my roommate, my research partner and one of her roommates. We had a pretty decent spot near the stage. Unfortunately for me, our tickets were standing room only and by the end of the concert I couldn't concentrate on the music because my back was aching so much.

Concert #10: Triple Door, Seattle, Washington
-Stars

This concert was the day after Imogen Heap's concert and I went with the same group minus my roommate. I waited outside the venue all afternoon in downtown Seattle for tickets to this show. Not completely necessary but we got standing room tickets that were bumped up to booth tickets once we got inside and people didn't show up. Pretty nifty. One of the singers seemed to have had too much to drink before the show and grabbed one of the audience member's food and threw it at the wall, yelling, "YOU DON'T BRING A DOGGIE BAG TO A ROCK CONCERT!" I remember thinking that I would have never classified Stars' music as rock music. The guy kept bringing up the incident throughout the show. It was annoying. Their music was good though and they performed their newest album which had yet to be released at the time. I just can't listen to the dude's soft vocals on their CDs without thinking about what a jerk he is in person.

Upcoming Show:
-Iron & Wine in Austin, Texas this Friday.

Going with Brenden, Chris, and Chris's friend Sydney. Super excited. I love Austin, Texas and hopefully will get to spend some of the afternoon there too.

Groups I want to see perform before I die:
Radiohead (Seeing Radiohead perform live is seriously at the top of my bucket list. I want this to happen so badly.)
Sigur Ros (Loved their music the first time I heard it. LOVE their documentary Heima, which Brenden so kindly got me for Christmas. Now I want to see them live, surrounded by mountains in Iceland while I wear an awesome Icelandic sweater.)

Google image search!

I feel like I've been waiting my whole life for Google image search.  I'm excited!

Google announces Search by Image and Voice Search for desktop, revamped mobile search

Quote

"I was living my life sideways. I did not act on what I wanted, I did not say the things I thought, and being so stifled and clamped all the time left me exhausted; no matter what I was doing, I was always imagining something else. Grades felt peripheral, but the real problem was, everything felt peripheral."

from the book Prep by Curtis Sittenfeld